Blast Radius
So I (Roz) am in the kitchen preparing a dessert for the nights entertaining. I hear an ominous sound and realise that Ariana has done her big poo for the day. I wait the required 5 minutes to make sure she has totally finished and sure enough, once pootime has ended Ari strikes up a cry to signal the need for a nappy change. So I take her to the change table and clean her up.
She lays there happily and just as I move to my left to lift her leg for the final wipedown KABOOM! Projectile poo! All over the change table, the carpet, the bed, the wall, her baptism outfit laying on the bed, the nappy bag on the bed, my Buzz Lightyear bag on the bed, the doona cover, soaked into the doona, under the bed, on the high chair stored under her bed, and last but not least, all down Mum's right side and over her face INCLUDING into her open mouth.
YUK YUK YUK
Yes that is right, I was talking to her at the time and poo went INTO MY MOUTH. I have a curse or something. But no kidding this poo went over 2 metres from her bottom to strike the wall across the room. It is easily over 2m away. I think I may need to go measure the distance. Is there a Guiness World Record for the furtherest projected poo? Ariana Grace Niven may be a record breaker! In hindsight it would of been much better if I had just been standing right infront of her.
TIP: Always stand directly in the centre of the projectile poo zone. It saves you much time and effort.
Nivens out
4 comments:
Roz, I think there's another tip missing: always keep your mouth closed when doing nappy related activities!
Ha, ha, ha....I think we must have it easier with Catherine...she has not come up with any projectile poos...just vomits but NEVER in my mouth! How did you manage to sterilise everything afterward?! Hope it all came out! See you at the baptism!
Now that's just charming!
I guess it figures from a Niven... ;-)
God bless,
Kutzey.
all i can say is that at least all she projectiles is poo. no vomit or anything woo hoo! though she has an uncanny accuracy ... hmmmm. do i detect a good eye co-ordination here?
roz
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